New Year intention: be selfish (hear me out!)
Now hear me out, because I’m not telling you to become a person that never considers others — absolutely not! In fact, our life became hell last year BECAUSE of people like that, so I would beg you to be considerate of others (respectful of others, and their boundaries, and mindful of the fact that your so-called freedom ends where someone else’s begins).
What I’m trying to tell you via this blog post is to become selfish, as in, to live your life on your own terms, as long as you’re not hurting others… Now, this is a bit of a contradictory statement, as, when one decides to do exactly that, it inevitably creates hurt. Like, when hubby and I finally told our families about our decision not to have children… My mom was extremely hurt, but choosing my mother’s happiness over my own sure wasn’t going to help anyone, right? You see that, don’t you? And if you’re one of those jumping at the chance to tell me, let me stop you — not for a moment have I regretted that decision!
Anyway… I hope in 2023 you finally become selfish enough to say no to the things that don’t bring you joy nor serve you in any way, no to the people that only show up when they need something from you or suck the life out of you one way or another (I have steadily been doing this since the pandemic), no to the situations that don’t feel right or comfortable, and finally, saying yes to putting yourself first.
But, in order to do that, you have to be honest with yourself and identify all that is listed above, and the direction in which you want to take your life. And, above all, you have to make peace with it and what comes after.
This requires introspection, reflection, a little bit of list-making, and, of course, courage, especially if you are or have been a “people-pleaser” or someone that has cared too much about what others think of you. You are the one in your shoes and the one living your life, why care about what others have to say, especially when they know nothing about it?
Cheers to a new year — one when you finally put yourself first!
xo,
Em
